Friday, September 09, 2005


Previous Posts Concurrent with The Actual Trip:
Second Week
Concerning my recent fiasco
of returning to the mainland
to find somewhere to live...
It started off badly when i arrived in Portland, Oregon rather late in the evening.
One thing that i have resolved to do in the future, is to consult & familiarize myself with maps of the areas that i am about to penetrate...! It turns out that Vancouver; where i was intending to get to, is about 1 mile from Portland, right across the Columbia River to the North. i wasn't especially clear on this. i thought that it should be possible to take a bus or use the local 'Train' there, but because Vancouver is in Washington, Not Oregon, this was impossible. Maybe in other places, they have local bus service that jumps back & forth between closely linked cities that are separated by State Boundaries & Famous Rivers, But not here... Is there some kind of Anamosity that i didn't hear about...??? So when i left the Airport terminal and asked Bus Supervisor how to get to Vancouver, he assured me that since i was unwilling to pay $60 for a taxi there, i could alternately walk there, along the Freeway. This turned out to be a Very Bad Idea. ( ! ) First of all, there were NO sidewalks or even a reasonable shoulder to walk along, in the middle of the night. But i continued for about 2 miles, before i began to become seriously concerned about being hit by a station wagon filled with unruly children, or a pickup controlled by a drunken psuedo-cowboy. This turned out to be much more difficult than i would have hoped, since the people that designed this freeway took great pains to make sure that no one, except me, could aimless wander onto it. So i walked & walked, attempting to find a break or opening, or gap or off-ramp away from the ubiquitous chain-link fencing, topped with razor-wire, Not that i could have climbed over it anyway, but maybe someone younger, and more determined to cross the freeway than myself. Finally, after climbing over an embankment, i found a spot where the fence had be cut away, and pulled out to reveal an opening. Unfortunately, this opened onto a Very Steep Hill that while trying to slide down, severly twisted my right knee...! It twisted so violently off to the left, and backwards that i was astonished when i was able to stand on it. Apparently; At that time, my brain was being flooded with Endorphins, or somesuch, and the pain that would come later, and persist for 3 weeks+ was absent for that time being. After i reached the bottom of the hill, i continued in what i thought was the same direction that i had been traveling in, while on the freeway, but was, in fact, 90 perpendicular to it... So i ended up walking another 5 miles in essentially the wrong direction before i finally found a clean spot to sleep for the night, at a Asian Food Distribution Warehouse.
The next day; i took a series of buses to Portland proper, and took a Greyhound to Vancouver.
It was there that i discovered, that while Vancouver seemed to be a very nice & clean town, it was actually called Fort Vancouver, and one of the critera that i had imposed upon myself, after living in Bremertowne, right next to a Military Navel Base, for 15 years, was to keep as far away as anything having to do with the Military as possible-- So after spending a few minutes at the Library to juggle my Bank accounts around, i left there, had a Sandwich at Subway, that later made me VERY sick, i headed for Ellensburg.
It turned out that what made me so sick was FAKE eggs, and without knowing this -then- i had another sandwich at Subway, without Cheeze, but with the FAKE eggs, and it too made me VERY sick...!
At Ellensburg, which is also a very nice & clean town, with brickwork sidewalks covering most the downtown area, i found that the security around the church that i used to sleep at, 20 years previously, had been substatially improved... [ ! ]
Nearly everything else about the town had changed, i couldn't find anything that looked familar.
In the 15 years that i lived in Bremertowne, where it stayed remarkably the same for that entire time, everywhere else i looked, The towns had completely redefined themselves...
After spending only a few hours in Ellensburg, i was already starting to become very anxious... Being constantly anxious is normal for me, but this was even more anxiety than i was used to.
For one thing, i had no idea what to do before the library would open, i hadn't come across any parks, and my feet were already killing me! Plus i couldn't orient myself. I bought a map. This was a very nice plastic map that was pre-segmented, so that you couldn't fold it up wrong. It was impossible. And it was pretty expensive. All throughout this trip, in every town i landed in, ( just about ) i would buy a map; This turned out to compromise about 10% of my budget for the the entire Fiasco.
When the library opened, i discovered, like in Vancouver, And Hawai'i, Their Computer usage policies were created by a comittee of South American Monkeys. As annoying, in many ways, was my stay in Bremertowne, They pioneered the intellegent use of Computers within their Library System. Except for Seattle, It was the best i've come across anywhere.
In Ellensburg; i looked through the local paper for someplace to live and found that the cheapest, smallest, vermin infested closets were going for $900 a Month. i was frazzled...!!!
After that i looked into getting somekind of Sliding Rent dealie...
The Paper, or the Internet Site or somewhere...???...said that it WASN'T related to Section Eight,
But it turned out that it was... and when i went to the local Houseing Office, they not only didn't in any way administer Section Eight, the guy behind the desk KNEW ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about it...!!!
i hate that.
i've been running into that sort of thing, over & over again throughout my life, and i never get used to it, nor can i understand it...
Very often; it will so seem-- that some 'Difficulty' that i'm having with some 'agency' will, by all appearances, be the first time that they've ever had to deal with it...!!!
So anyways, although he gave he a huge stack of papers to fill out, To be sent to Yakima... i left them all in the outer office, and then left, crapped my pants ( again ) and i think i stayed in town for one more night, principally because the bus leaving for gawd only knows where, didn't leave until 9 the next morning.
While i was in Ellensburg, i did find a fairly good place to sleep, on the porch of the local high school. It was one of those weird places that looks like it's 'Exposed' -- But because of the way the street light hits the buildings, the difference between where the light is 'on' and 'off' constitutes a VERY high degree of contrast, when seen from the sidewalk, so that while it seemed well lit while i was up there, from the sidewalk, it was absolutely black!
The next day at the Subway, i overheard the very ODD conversation that let me become aware that the eggs in their sandwiches were FAKE, and due to the YELLOW crap that was pouring out of me, it became clear to me that that was the source of the 'problem'...!!!
How much more does one need to believe that all the little things that happen to us, are arranged by angels?
i was heading West at that time... so i kind of wanted to go to Port Angeles... But when i got there, after stopping in several small towns along the way, i saw some huge OIL TANKERS in the bay, and that coupled with the generally delapitated condition of the town, it sufficiently spooked me into leaving Immediately...!
All this time, i was jumping from town to town, and stopping for the briefest moments in their libraries to check on the price of rooms, and i never did try to find what was 'Normal' for any particular town, i only ever checked for that day, or maybe the previous day... in the want ads.
It was always the same, as i looked further and further into this, i became more and more frazzled, so that instead of becoming MORE complacient, and willing to move into anything that seemed cost apporopriate, as i have done in the past, and maybe BECAUSE i have done that in the past, with disasterous results, i became more reluctant to accept anything less than perfect, and nothing was close to perfect. Nothing would do.
It was hopeless.
Nevertheless-- i continued on around the Pennensula there in Washington, passing through rundown, termite infested town after hobo incrusted town-- until i got back to Seattle, and from there, headed East.
Also: i kept passing through all these places where i knew people, or near places where i knew people; and it seemed to me, as it is always the case; Human Contact Only Complicates Matters... So i didn't stop and say hello to anyone.
First stop was Yakima. Since it was a Sunday or Weekend or Something... i didn't even stop there long enough to visit the library... or did i...??? i think i did. or did i. i can't remember.
i did see one crazy lady-- which i interpreted to be a BAD OMEN, since she was VERY crazy.
Additionally; She was the only street person i saw there.
There are FORMULAS to these sorts of things, and one of these Formulas, states that when a town has only a small number of street people, and they are all VERY crazy, that is not a good sign of something or another.
Generally: A BAD OMEN.
Much better is a town with lots of Street people that don't look like street people at all... That are passing themselves off as just simple Nuts or Kooks. This is a GOOD OMEN.
i didn't see this anywhere i went.
An older example of this might have been Berkley 20 years ago.
After Yakima, i wanted to go to Moscow, and i was thinking that the simplest way would be straight across Southern Washington, into Idaho-- But the Greyhound Bus went all the way up to Spokane first, and i had a Lay Over there of about an hour & a half, and while there, this Older Woman that i KNEW from Somewhere, kept staring at me, so i left and waited outside...
Where Did i Know her From...??? Years & years ago... or more recently...
While i was bussing around the Pennensula, i saw a Crazy Lady that i'd seen many times when i was living in Bremertowne, and had even talked to several times, until she started SCARING ME with all her crazy talk...
So i asked the bus driver on our way to Port Townsend about her, and the driver agreed with me that she was VERY Crazy...!!!
That was the only person that i was sure i'd met somewhere else.
It's kind of quirky -- i think -- that i havn't seen or met anyone in Hawai'i that i've seen or met somewhere else...???
Also; i havn't been talking to ANYONE while i've been here for the last year+...
The first time i was here, i made 'friends' with two black girls, and talked to lots of people from time to time.
That is very rare now...???
Moscow was a very nice town too.
One ad that i looked at, was for a House Sharing for only 165$ a month...!!!
But the guy that owned the house would be gone half the time, and i didn't want to be in a whole house by myself...!!! That is one of the most Quirky things about Asperger's...! i hate being around people, but i want to be around people...!!! ( ??? ) Like when i was going to school at Eastern Washington University, i lived in a Dorm, and had my own room, and would go down to the TV room, and sometimes play board games down there, but there was a very comfortable 'Distance' between me and everyone else living there.
That is the kind of place i would like to live in again.
There were some other places in Moscow that were 'kind of' cheap, but i was already so completely frazzled, i didn't even LOOK at them...!!! Did i stay there even one night... i stayed there one night, at the church on the top of the hill. It was VERY dirt there, and got my bag and sleeping bag all DUSTY...! ugh.
Then i got on a bus to San Francisco, but first i had to go further EAST to Salt Lake City...!!!
That is the way Greyhound works.
What i was most annoyed by, was that during the very annoying trip across Nevada, there weren't any Good Deserts...!!! The land scape was exactly like Central Washington.
What made these trips especially annoying though, was NOT the crazy Schizophrenic lady that i had to sit by for 24 Freaking Hours... But rather, the extremely LOUD Sniper from Viet Nam that was telling all these gruesome stories to a bunch of kids ALL NIGHT LONG...!!!
What is perhaps more annoying, was that i suspected that he was LYING...!!!
At one point; he mentioned that he was just about to turn 50, so that he would be about 2 weeks younger than i am-- But i missed out ( ? ) [ !!! ] on the Viet Nam War by about 3 years...???
So that-- If he had been in The VNW, he would have to have enlisted when he was 14...!!!
Then after the kids left and he quieted down, Another BLACK guy, in the front of the bus became the most annoying character on the bus.
What he was doing, after he collected a sympathic audience of fellow imbiciles, was continuously harass an elderly Mexican man that apparently spoke very little English...
It seems like whenever i most need my LightSaber-- That's the morning that i would leave it on the kitchen table on my way out of the house.
i do not like bus travel.
So essentially:
i just started out this last trip-- Completely Frazzled, and i couldn't seem to 'Relax'...!
i was just frantically jumping from one town to the next...
What a waste of Time, Money ( over $1000 ), & Psychic Reserves...!!!
Plus: Now i have no plan.
i have no idea what i'm going to do to find somewhere to live.
i can't even decide WHERE i would like to live.
Everywhere seems deeply wrong.
And my feet still hurt.
( Plus all my other parts! )

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