Friday, August 31, 2012

Poltical Advertising

Political Advertising

Ads that are disingenuous or insincere or state out & out lies,
are just wrong.

Mean spirited ads against your opponent are just wrong.
You should always speak charitably about your opponent,
And all The more so; if they are mentally disabled or clinically insane.

Political Advertising should be fun!
Your Own Ads for yourself, your positions or programs Should be light hearted and emphasize how you & your ideals are going to help america, The world, humanity, The environment, wild-life, And The Deep Future.
Your own Ads should always include :
smiling, laughing, giggling children,
puppies playing with kittens,
Wide Blue Skies with Billowing White Clouds,
A Entirely Unique Theme Song,
You in casual attire, without shoes, throwing a Frisbee,
Doing chores around The house,
helping at a soup kitchen,
picking up dog poop,
painting a watercolor landscape,
talking about simple, common problems that deserve simple solutions,
reminding everyone that america needs both
The Rich Capitalists
and The Common Rabble that form The Backbone and Foundation of our Economy
and That we all need to care for our Elderly,
disabled, Wild-life, The environment
& The Future.
Playing with Technologies that won’t be available for at least another 10 years.
Changing a Diaper or giving an Elderly woman a sponge bath.
Visiting a Court House and relaying a few anecdotes about how The justice system is severely broken.
Spinning a Large World Globe and giving A short history of The World.

So long as you are scrupulously Honest and Accurate with your ‘Attack’ Ads,
And they are light-hearted; It is permissible to introduce a sprinkling of Kookiness.
Such as:
A Series of Ads FOR your Opponent that feature a wide range of citizens espousing The wonderful features & aspects of your Opponent.
If you believe that your opponent is advocating some policy that will hurt The american people, The world in general, The environment or sell our future to cannibals from Mars;
Then you DO NOT Attack those positions, you find sincere citizens that accurately describe these policies and why they are good for (x.
This series of Ads should feature a very wide spectrum of citizens, The Filthy Rich, Poor Dirt Farmers, Evangelical Christians & Moslems, School Children, Talking Chimps, Schizophrenic Homeless Nudists, Supermarket Sackers, Astronauts, Amish Dwarves, Street Thugs or Convicts on Death Row, Starving Poets, Police that are interrupted from beating up skateboarders, Domestic Terrorists working in their bomb factory, Scientists working on heretical or seemingly absurd projects; and so on.
The common theme of all these ‘interviews’ is that The speaker will always introduce some very subtle tangental idea of their own, that would strongly suggest that they are, quite insane.

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