More Recent Events... SecondWeekOfMay

1. Cingular is Definitely Evil...!
   So what i find most surprising... i find so many things surprising all the time, because, i suspect, i am hopelessly naive about everything... Or maybe it has to do with the bad molecules that are tumbling around inside my brain like hopped up hamsters on rocket fuel & Coke a Cola...??? Anyways-- What i find most surprising about The Cingular Sales & Service Centers is that they provide Absolutely NO Service What-so-Ever, and they are Entirely UnApologetic About it...!!! They are Sales People, and are there to Sell you Crap, Not answer alot of Damn Fool Questions, or Actually get your Phone Working again, after their Computers have Pointlessly Shut it Off, Again...! For no reason at all. -- The Problem i've been having is that every month, when they are supposed to take 53$ out of my Checking Account, and Turn on my Phone for another Month-- They Don't...!!! Apparently, They have somekind of 'Bug' in their System that makes it keep forgetting that keep telling them it's OK to take the money out of my Account... If only the Computers at 'Smart Wireless' had been that shy... They were just the opposite, they would keep dipping into my Account for no reason at all...!!! -- Anyways... So when i went over to the Cingular Center at Kapolei, they told me in no uncertain terms to get the Hell out of their store if i was going to persist in asking embarrassing service related questions, and insist that they help me get my phone back on... -- i started screaming. -- normally; i'm a pretty calm, stoic sort of bowl of tapioca pudding, but when i come across pinworms like this that crawl into my anus and start biting my tiny intestinal linings and throwing litter around in there... Well---it gets my goat. -- So 2 days later, i calmed down a bit and went over to the kiosk at Ala Moana Center and absolutely insisted that they get my phone working again. i was VERY Persistent. i would not leave. i was being tended to by a clerk that may well have been there for less than a week. He didn't seem to know much about anything, and insisted that before he make the tiniest decision, he ask the manager first. Hours went by. i occasionally advised other customers to choose another Cell Phone Company. Finally; The Sub-Manager came over and decided to call Customer Service for me. It should be noted here, that the Sales People have Absolutely No Authority to Do Anything WhatSoEver... It all has to be done by an Indian ( In India ) Through their call in Service Center. So after she'd threaded through most of the Phone Hierarchial Menu's for me, she insisted that i talk to 'Frank' myself, Which i absolutely Didn't want to do, because along with their adorable and incomprehensible accents, the phone lines to India are decidedly substandard, Plus, in the hallway at Sear's, i had to listen to their Intercom System Constantly reminding shoppers of various Specials & To keep an eye out for Roving Clowns... ( ??? ) Somehow; Frank began to comprehend why i'd called, and while referring to his computer screen, put me on hold for about 20_minutes. When he returned, he suggested that this 'problem' of mine was due to a Technical Error that was endemic, But it was now Fixed...???!!! Then he took all my personal Information again, which they do every month when i call to turn my phone back on... ( This has been going on for 4 months now...! ) ...and then i had to listen to all the legal babble again, so that i could press [1] to indicate that i was giving them permission, again, to take the 53$ out of my checking account. He assured me that everything was all fixed now, and i wouldn't have anymore Problems. -- Five hours later, my phone is working, but it won't connect with the Internet. The Clerk at the Ala Moana Kiosk suggested that it may take 24-hr's before that would 'Come-Back-On'. i told him that he was working for Satan and that he would surely burn in hell for all eternity. He seemed to think i knew what i might be talking about, because he had the most curiously 'bedeviled' expression on his face ( ?) Some people can just tell when the truth is being spoken to them.
2. Wiener Dogs
   i've been seeing alot of Wiener dogs around here lately that look like other dogs... Like German Shepherds or Collies or Those Shaggy Cream Coloured Dogs...??? What is the deal with that... Are they a Fad where you live...???
3. Another Example of Cingularistic Evil...!
   After i discovered my last bout with Cingular's Billing Practices, i wandered over to their Service Center in Kapolei, and while they were ignoring me; i found a brochure that announced a 'new' billing option that consisted of Prepaid Cards... i don't know what the cards would actually do, if anything, but the net gist of it was that you could buy 'packets' of minutes for fixed amounts, when you needed them...? Then these packets would remain 'good' for a fixed amount of time, such as; 30, 90 or 365 days...! This sounded wonderful; i would actually save money under this plan, and it would provide me with the incentive i needed to stop fooling around on my phone so much...! So when i asked about this... ( later at the Ala Moana Center, since shortly after they got tired of me pawing at all their display phones at the Kapolei store, i had a snippity fit when they accused me of being Broke... ( the reason my phone wasn't working, was because my Checking Account was Empty ( So they Claimed...!!! ) -- But this was NOT So...! and i let them know this-- Then while the Sales Pinworm was being OH-SO GawdDang Polite-- i just about lunged over the counter and began throttling his pudgy brown neck and shaking his head back & forth until his eyes rolled freely in their sockets... [ but i digress ] ... So-- The next day when i was over at the Ala Moana Service Center, i asked about this Card Plan, Which is specifically aimed at Cingular's GoPhone Customers... ( it may be noted at this point that before Cingular bought out AT&T-- They had No Go Phone Program... That was an AT&T promotional do-dad... ) So that NOW-- When Cingular says that My AT&T phone, Bought at a Cingular Store!-- Won't work with 'Their' GoPhone plan...!!! OH! Doesn't that make your genitals itch...! So anyways, if i wanted to get into their Pay As You Go Card Plan, i would have to Buy A Whole New Phone...!!! It was about this time that i began to lecture them about how it's the software in the phones that allows them communicate with the Service Provider... and such...! All they would need to do; Is plug a new SIM Card into my Phone, and i would be able to switch plans... If even that...! -- It seems to me that any changes would be with my Billing File in their Computer, and it wouldn't/shouldn't change AnyThing about My Phone or service at all. Curiously; They were undeterred by my logic, and continued to ignore me, and it was several more minutes, dozens perhaps, before they finally became so fatigued by my haranguing of their potential customers, that the sub-manager finally called their Service Department for me... -- The Reason that i didn't want to call, myself... was that their Automated Menu Selection Operator is -- Just Plain Broken...!!! It keeps breaking up, and it refuses to understand my selections, and worse-- perhaps, ( most frustrating ) is that it's constantly inserting into my attempts to find a person to help me; It's catch phrase "I'm sorry, i couldn't understand your last request, If you'd like me to help you, please allow me to list your following options; When you hear the choice you'd like, Just repeat to me... " and then when i do repeat it, Over her reading of the next option, because she never pauses to allow me to say what i want, she'll insert that blurb again...!!! So-- The service lady at the Ala Moana Store navigated through that for me...-- i think she was Pressing Buttons, and not saying anything...!!! ( Secrets that Customers are Never Told About...!!! ) -- But anyways... i didn't get to change to The Pay as you go Card plan. What a Rip Off...!!!
4. Disaster...!!!
   Some crazy person installed a Porch Light on the Porch where i usually sleep...! A really Bright One...!!! i've been sleeping there for like Seven ( 7 ) Months...!!! So it's probably overdue...! Still, i think it's kind of 'ironically' twisted that i'm forcing them to spend Moocho Hawai'ian Electrical Dollars to keep me off their Porch, While maybe it would be in everyone's better interest, If they took that money and spent it on somekind of crazy program that would provide The Homeless with a more permanent solution. But of course; No one in Bush's America Thinks that way. No one in Clinton's America thought that way either...??? Or Reagan's America...!!! Maybe it's just not the American Way...! -- So the net effect is that i've had to move to new ( undisclosed ) location that is actually better in 'some' ways-- i'm sleeping better, although; it's a little more cramped, and it may be a little dirtier... and it's alot Darker...! But it will do for awhile... ( ??? ) i was looking around right after the porch light went up, for a new place to sleep... and i haven't found AnyThing that is even a plausible alternative...!!! Partly because there are so many homeless in Hawai'i competing for good places, and partly because i'm so Picky...!!! A lot of homeless people camp out at Bus-Stops, and i've tried that -Once- But i didn't like it all that much... ( it will work in a pinch, so long as it's not Raining too terribly hard...!!! ( ? ) )
5. More Money Woes...!
   When i first got here, i was determined to save my money, so that i could fly back to the mainland and find a place to live...! But after this recent Fiasco on the Mainland, i've become very depressed, and i've been spending money like a monkey with burning trousers...! Often as much as $4.00 a day for food...!!! i'm completely out of control...!!!